You’re a survivor. You’re not gonna give up.

If Your Father’s Day Sucks

Remember: your dad is not your fault.

This post is for anybody who needs it today or ever.

I wrote an essay called, “Surprise! You Don’t Have To Love Your Family.” I’d put it up here but it’s in my book “Real Artists Have Day Jobs.” I think I can only reprint it with permission. So I wrote this.

1. It will be over soon.
2. You can turn off social media.
3. You have permission to be your own dad.
4. You have permission to hate your dad.
5. You have permission to love your dad even if he was, objectively speaking, a piece of shit.
6. You can pick a different dad. I have a friend whose imaginary dad is a TV character. Not even a human. It’s Lion-O from “Thundercats.” Hey, whatever works. That can be the dad you picture.
7. You can say, “My dad and I don’t get along, so this is a rough day for me.” You can also say, “I don’t celebrate today but I hope you enjoy it. I’m dadgnostic.”
8. You didn’t break your dad and you can’t fix your dad. Isn’t that terrible? Isn’t that great?
9. Dads aren’t always men. Men aren’t always dads.
10. Your dad is not your fault.

If your dad doesn’t love you enough or isn’t there for you, that’s his fault, not yours. You are great and I am your dad today and I love you. I am proud of you. Congratulations on continuing to raise yourself.